Supposedly true warning labels from real products. Do I believe they’re really true? Sadly, yes, I do….
In a US guide to setting up a new computer
To Avoid Condensation Forming, Allow The Boxes To Warm Up To Room Temperature Before Opening.
(Sensible, but the instruction was inside the box.)
On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids
Lie Down On Bed And Insert Poscool Slowly Up To The Projected Portion Like A Sword-Guard Into Anal Duct. While Inserting Poscool For Approximately 5 Minutes, Keep Quiet.
In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
Open Other End.
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins
Why Not Try Tossing Over Your Favourite Breakfast Cereal?
On a Sears hairdryer
Do Not Use While Sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos
You Could Be A Winner! No Purchase Necessary. Details Inside.
On a bar of Dial soap
Directions: Use Like Regular Soap.
On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert
Do Not Turn Upside Down.
(printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
Product Will Be Hot After Heating.
On a Korean kitchen knife
Warning Keep Out Of Children.
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights
For Indoor Or Outdoor Use Only.
On a Japanese food processor
Not To Be Used For The Other Use.
On Sainsbury’s peanuts
Warning – Contains Nuts.
On an American Airlines packet of nuts
Instructions: Open Packet, Eat Nuts.
On a Swedish chainsaw
Do Not Attempt To Stop Chain With Your Hands Or Genitals.
On a child’s superman costume
Wearing Of This Garment Does Not Enable You To Fly.
On some frozen dinners
Serving Suggestion – Defrost.
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
Fits One Head.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron
Do Not Iron Clothes On Body.
On Boot’s “Children’s” cough medicine
Do Not Drive Car Or Operate Machinery.
On Nytol sleep aid
Warning: May Cause Drowsiness